Locks of Love 3

Today Jillian Completed her 3rd Locks of Love Donation. The tangles had been worrying her for several weeks. So she decided now is the time. She is anxious to grow it back by October so she can use it as a duck dynasty beard for Halloween. I assured her we will find her a fake beard, so that satisfied her. She cracks me! One of a kind! She has received so many compliments! I thought Grandad would cry when he saw how old it made her look.

HOME

Saturday, March 9, was the day I had waited for, home at last. It took most of the day to get me ready, and finally left around 2:30. The trip was horrifying, with the bouncing leaving me extremely nauseous and sore. When we pulled in the driveway, I had to have Granny take the kids to the back room. I didn't want to come home crying, so I got myself together and got into bed where they each came in to visit. Of course they cheered me immediately! They had adorable welcome home posters to hang by my bed. Since being home,
I've had a few set backs with back pain and nausea as well as cold chills. We are now taking my temp every few hours to watch for any signs of infection. Laikyn also often forgets as I thought she would and whacks the belly. Overall, it's amazing how God has given me four very different children with different gifts. Brandon has been using his tech savvy to keep me in movies and playing his guitar for me. Most importanly, if I call at midnight, he will bring me a snowcone!!! :)
Korbin wants to learn about intestines
And has been using his body models and book to sit in here and ask me hundreds of questions, most of which are geared to make me laugh. Laikyn is my snuggle bug , just have to watch her quick little kickers. Makes me smile when she skips into the room to say hi mom.
Jillian does It all! Reads, holds my hand, long chats, errand girl! Rob has Been very faithful in my care! It's been hard for him to be away from them to and he left a few times just to reassure them. He forced me too walk, went on a night time heating pad expedition, bugged the nurses if they took to long, prayed with me each night when I couldn't pray for myself. He is always faithful!!

Looking back I know that I didn't do this on my own. I've never been been courageous or trusting. This happeded purely by Christ's grace. Altough the human hands are important, The Lord carried me through from the timing, to the Doctor, to the people and messages he allowed me receive at just the right time. I owe Jesus everything!

Home in Sight : March 8, 2013

Yesterday was hard with beginning solids and trying to manage pain orally rather than IV. Hydrocodone made sick, so they switched me to Percocet and although it makes me sleepy, it is much more helpful with managing the pain. I also still have dilaudid for breakthrough pain in between. Last night was much more restful and today I have just been trying to stay ahead of the pain as much as possible. Dr. G came in last night and said that we would finish my TPN today and get the drains out, then go home on Friday.

March 3, 2013

5:30 am...Usually I blog right before bed to reflect on the day. This morning I can't sleep, so I'm up trying to get my attitude adjusted for the upcoming day. Dealing with a little fear this morning as possible surgery is looming ahead tomorrow. I'm sure it's a God thing that my friend Sarah sent me a Max Lucado book about fear. As I read over part last night, I was reminded that fear corrodes our confidence in Gods goodness and is the opposite response of faith. So this morning, as Im tempted to give into fear, Im turning to Gods word, recalling all the other things in my life he has brought me through, and realizing that while fear is a natural physical response, I can let His courage control how I respond to the fear. Just my sermon to myself for the day... How can anyone get through this scary life without God's presence? John 14:1- Let not your heart be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in me.

Before noon today, Dr. G's associate came in and said that my surgery is scheduled for tomorrow at 12:30 pm. There is another one scheduled before mine, so it will depend on how it goes as to my running on time. I will have a colostomy with a temporary stoma and bag attached to my stomach. When they do that, I will have a j pouch also formed on the inside. The stoma will be temporary and when the j pouch heals, I will have a second surgery to reattach it. Usually it is 8-12 weeks between surgeries. Thats the facts I know at this point and I guess too much information can be overwhelming, so I might not ask a lot more questions at this point. Dont want to freak myself out any more than I already am. I do know that I'm a lot more ready for this than I would have been a few years ago. Just tired of being sick, worrying about when I will be sick next, or wondering if I can even eat out with my family without staying near a bathroom.

This afternoon , Granny brought L and K to visit. L sat in my lap and snuggled and played and ate lots of snacks. She seemed to be doing well. When daddy had to take her to the car, she stared at me so sadly and cried and clung. I know she doesn't understand, but it makes me sick to think of all she has been through and maybe feeling abandoned by me. I am praying so hard for my kids to be okay and that this situation won't cause them any more sadness. As Rob said, "God cared for her for the two years in china and He will care for her now." I will close tonight with a funny note. Last week, I gave Korbin a diagram of the digestive system so he could see where I was sick. Granny caught him on You Tube looking up colon surgery last night. I think he will end up being the Doctor that finally cures Colitis and Crohns!! God bless everyone tonight!!

March 2 , 2013

Today was very boring til the afternoon. I was so anxious to be at Jillian's academic team, that it was depressing to me. She and i worked so hard as a team all year. Rob gave me play by plays which was about to give me heart failure. We lost the quick recall, but 7 individual kids on SHES placed to go to regional on their written part of the test. Jillian took third place in math. So proud and thrilled. This was kind of our special thing this year as I helped coach and curled ip in bed with her late many nights, reviewing the volumes of material. Just wanted her to do her personal best and I believe she did. Later in the afternoon, The Swihart family came in with a bag of goodies for the kids and a nice visit. Love that family! next Aunt gay and Uncle Steve came for a visit. It took them over 5 hours in wreck traffic, so I know they love me! haha! About 8 when I thought the day was over, Jilli and Rob surprised me to spend the night! I am so blessed to have this wonderful set of family and Friends, but sometimes you grow closer in crisis and I felt that happen each time we bond together to help each other! Hope they know the blessings they are!!:)

3-1- 2013

Today I had an early visit from Brother Barry who has been a great encouragement! Later Brandon and Maggie came to visit for his 22nd birthday, so that cheered me greatly since it would be my first night alone. I also had calls from various friends until late at night with Vickey, Dad and Kevin. I didn't get as lonely as I thought.